I cannot stand the people at the UW-Madison. I don't understand how hard it is to be helpful. If you're a student advisor, isn't your job supposed to be to advise and help rather than be judgmental and condescending? I'm so annoyed right now and I need to vent. All I want is to take a normal bio course, learn about something I haven't learned before. Why is that such a hard concept to grasp? And why, as an advisor, would you assume that the UW is a person's FIRST CHOICE!? Do they realize how awful the state of Wisconsin really is!??! Not to mention, why would you assume that as a person who already has their bachelor's degree in Biology is looking to re-take all their courses!?!? How exactly does that help advance a person's learning!?!

I'm so frustrated. Now, I'm thinking about just taking this stupid econ course because I am sick of dealing with all the dumb bio people. I don't understand how people can be so clueless and stupid. I was spoiled. Honestly, I was spoiled by going to school in Chicago and going to the U of C where the staff there isn't stupid and condescending and judgmental and actually understand that people like to advance their learning, not repeat it over and over again.

I need to get out of this state. Now, I'm thinking I'm becoming desparate. Whatever it takes to go is starting to sound better and better every day....

Gosh I really can't stand how dumb the people are in this state. It's like Wisconsin is a punishment for past bad deeds.

Please help. Help me get out of Madison.

I don't know what it is, but I've been in a funk lately. Perhaps it's because this weekend did not turn out the way I wish it did. Or maybe it's because last weekend was so crazy and upsetting. But ever since last weekend (more specifically last Friday) I've been in a funk. It was nice spending time though with my mom. It's been a while since I've gone shopping with her to "Grandma's favorite store." She and my dad are so funny. My mom stopped cutting fruit so she could hug me good-bye and my dad came outside to see me off. (He also scolded me for driving fast. I don't think 75-80 mph is THAT bad...) I was good though on my way home. Stuck to around 70-75 (even though everyone else was going 90.)

I've just been so frustrated though. Sometimes I wonder what the deal is with the people that I date. I honestly wonder if they just don't know me that well, they hope that I'm not the person they know I am, if they're purposely ignorant or really are that unaware. And I realize sooner I later, I need to forgive and forget but now I am SO glad that I didn't ask someone to take me back. Seriously. I would never wish this on anyone and I don't think it's an easy thing to do. How do you love someone knowing how much they've hurt you? How do you trust a person when they say they only want to be with you when they've picked other people over you? And the funny thing is, this hasn't happened to me just once but twice! Although the first time it happened, I didn't hold a grudge because I had "picked" other people over him too.

I honestly don't know what to do. There are days when I'm so happy and there are days when I just wonder what I'm doing. Seriously, sometimes I feel like I'm just lying to myself because know I'm not that person. I'm petty. I'm vengeful. I don't like to get burned.

Here's the other thing I don't understand. If you really love a person and truly want to be with them, why would you ever give up? I mean, why would you ever stop caring? I just don't get it.

Sometimes I think there really isn't anyone out there who will make me unconditionally happy. I mean, I wonder why this has been so hard because it shouldn't be this hard right?

all right, time to focus.
blog later.
me.